Jaded

I think blogging is always depressing for me. I blog only when i’m feeling down. Maybe its a good way of venting frustration, without the need to trouble someone.

Christmas came and gone, so did New Year. Everything seems to gone by in a flash. I’m still quite taken aback by my shitty results, which i believe will haunt me in a long while.. Even though i wasnt particularly hardworking last year, the effort i put in couldn’t save my ass. contradicting was it!

Intern started in advance, and started out everything as a blur. My lucky intern-colleague may still be holiday somewhere in the northern hemisphere while i’m gonna do her handover with my supervisor tomorrow cos’ the upper study need to start school soon. work’s still in a mess, cos my supervisor has not given me the big picture (though will soon come after the other intern come) and i get real sleepy, like zombified at certain hours of the day. My colleagues are workaholics, well i believe they command a high pay, and i feel bad when i leave early to catch the shuttle bus. hmmm…. well, work is afterall sensitive. I’ve told myself to suck it up, learn as much, and present a better side of me. i think my work attitude sucked when i was working as a temp last time hahaha!

i have so many things that i want to do, but i procrastinate, and end up watching The Office drama online. Dramas really destroy people’s lives. i mean it used to be good, once a week kind, but with internet, its an addiction.

its really late, have to sleep soon.

I really want to be happier, well..i dont know.

blog another time. hopefully soon!

back!

im back! my last post was dated..15th august! thats approximately 4 months ago! 4 months have passed, many things have happened! exams gone and done with, albeit dreading the result day. Got an internship and is starting on the 21st, well supposed to start today(14th) but glad they postponed it!

have been watching lots of drama, well just one in particular, finally finished 30 episodes *phew*. i think i better not get myself involved with dramas anymore..its really time wasting and tiring! even though they are really enjoyable!

been spending time with Dawn, getting a x’mas tree and shopping around..feel really happy! perhaps a slight disappointment would be not able to travel! but i need to curb my travelling itch! save $$$.

also, i’ve packed my room, done household choses blahblah. time seems to have passed by really fast! but i just did some calculations, i’ve been officially slacking for only..*gasp* 11 days! exams ended last last week! seems eons ago.

my current plan for the week would be to:

gym, swim, buy more office clothes, spring clean, read some books, shop for present…since Dawn will be busy with DND i’ll be quite free i guess! 😛

its the Christmas season, but i haven seen the orchard lights, and may not be able to, since orchard road is flooded with people.

gosh need to sleep! blog another day..i will!

whateva!

maybe cos’ Dawn haven reply my sms..not sure how’s she now!

back to school, feel really bored and sad. lotsa pple disappear, supposely enjoying themselves in some part of the world, while i face my core modules in my crazy school. why cant studying be fun and enjoyable?

feeling demoralise, after knowing how much i’ve been lacking. i cant believe my faculty don have a ace-an-interview module. we should have that right? judging on how our graduates suck at them.

not enjoying my student life, but can wait to start work though.

a lil sad, when i don get to go exchange, cos of missed opportunities and well financial restrictions. they always say how easy it is to study overseas. is tt true? if only i could go hiking, and visit places!

14more weeks to exam! somehow somewhat i must ace through this sem, the 2nd toughest sem i suppose. taking 6modules worth of 26MC gosh im crazy. well, i think the toughest would be FYP *GASP*

i’ve decided:

1.) no tv, (lucky my honky drama serials mostly ended. (i’ve been catching forensic science 2 by bobby aw and many other A list actors and also watch this repeated drama call dragon love hahahahah. now im watchin this drama call when dog like cat (i think ahhaha) by my fav actor Loh Kar Leung! i took a glimpse of *yi2 qing2 bie2 lian4* starring gigi leung and miao qiao wei. plot seems goood! geez i must not be tempted!)

seems like no tv is tough huh. how i wish i can watch these dramas in cantonese! tt would be great!

2.)reduce time wasted on fb

3.) do more exercise and running to keep fit

4.) blah

dawn finally called! geeez.

ahhhhhhhhh dunnoe what i even want in life.  feel like i’ve played the wrong cards in my hands.  at least now i know i must hang in there and play my remaining cards correctly

just a venting post. not to be taken seriously.

did i mention i have a makeup lecture tml? it’ll be webcasted..but i hate watchin 2hr webcast at home..its never ending.

updates!

back from tioman, malaysia yesterday. went recreational diving with friends. it was our first recreational dive after obtaining our license eons ago!

it was an unplanned trip, the only thing we booked was fivestar bus tickets for 25SGD . the bus was sucky compared to the return bus fro only 14.2RM !!

accomodation was some non aircon old house for 50RM/night in which we shared among THREE pple. hhahha. think tts cheap? we ventured on and realised there was a cheaper room going at 35RM which looks much nicer. though cant call to book cos its for the bagpackers!

diving was relatively fun..saw turtles, stone fish, eel, other fish, and many corals. it was challengin to dive through compact spaces i.e cave like areas formed by rocks. cos im a noob. hahahaha. still max depth went was 28m which was kinda exciting/scary/cold/wadeva.

regret was that we didnt manage to rent our underwater camera successfully! some hiccups. maybe nxt time!

—————————————-

further back was dawn’s graduation! last last saturday. i thought i was late but infact i was just in time for the scroll/book giving ceremony. so proud of my Dawn! :D:D:D lucky i remembered to buy flower after i saw my friends graduation ceremony had flowers! so farnie!

holiday coming to an end!

i must say it is an exciting holiday so far!

i’ve been to the states – california (LA and SF), nevada(Las vegas), arizona (Grand Canyon), and just came back from Bali.

These are places i’ve never been to! i have never imagined myself going to the states even though i’ve known that USA plays a huge part in this world such as the economy, poitical, military, entertainment blahblah. to me, i remember USA as a place i would love to go when i could afford it. afterall, i don think my family would ever go there for a holiday. it would cost a bomb!

and so i met a fortunate girl who have been to USA 5 times! and she brought me along! well, i only spent 2.7k for 25days of fun, with much thanks to relatives of this girl who cared for us! to this amazing girl, i want to say a big “thank you”!

i kind of love the state! i didnt face much discrimination, perhaps cos i was in a hispanic-majority area. people are frenly in their service, (even though u dont know whether they are, but wth anyway hahaha) and life is a lot slower pace.

too bad USA is in a debt of trillions, not sure if it would be wise to work if given a chance. afterall, my frens and family are all here in sunny SG! and the food too. well, the choices of food in US is bearable at least.

bali was enjoyable, though i would prefer more free and easy rather than the constant travelling. well, my family prefers sightseeing..bobian! but i tried surfing! though it was kinda expensive or should i say i was overcharge, i had lotsa fun! 🙂 SPA was shiok too!

well, im glad i had a great time so far 🙂

reservist starting next next mon..sigh need to work out hardcore.

oh welll….

so far so good

i’ve been relaxing so much that i totally forgot to blog! well, Dawn had to bug me before i decide to update this. im not a hardworking blogger, but i gotta thank Dawn for updating on the events here in LA, california, USA.

yeah im in the USA! whoops. my first time there. and my first long flight. i think the furthest i’ve been was like japan i think. it was tiring >.<

i like the weather. my skins not oily at all hahahaha.

[oops i should have finished blogging last night but i fell asleep!]

yeah so its more of stay-home-relax-sleep now. lazy!

shall post some pictures i like before signing out

happy!

time flies!!

Tommorrow concludes the end of my year 2!

nothing much to look forward to, perhaps a good sleep and overdose of honky dramas.

have been a failing sem, (well hopefully not in terms of grades,)

a list of highlights of fail!

-SEP to hongkong — fail. damnit its just hongkong and so many pple going there for SEP. and apparaently alot of unis don offer chem engine! maybe only france and the likes, but…

-summer exchange– fail. well, got reservist. what to do! its a make up training already! they’ll not let me go til i attend it. shall try next june holiday

-US trip –fail. (tentative) i just saw a video a WHO official said mexico may have over reacted..but well if they didnt take precautious measures i think it might really infect the whole world! but theres deaths only in mexico right…

-special term? — fail. well, with the concluding US saga, i cant really do special term to lighten my modules! registration over!

-lead a YEP ? –fail (tentative) with the current problem in numbers(too many pple), likelihood of leading is low.

oh well, i tried! beats better than not trying!

poor egypt pigs. how can they cull all the pigs? (it must be evil plot by the majority race) i stayed with pigs before. they are so cute!

guilty when i eat them >.<

oh well, i just had 2 bak kut teh meals in this week. i’ll eat less of pork and more of chicken.

ah at least my family members will not be worried. still have consolation prize bali! oh well..need to replan my holidays.

super long overdued post!

goshgosh! i feel so guilty i haven been blogging for more than a month!!! its a hectic sch term i must say! have been sleeping at 2am for weeks and yet doin nothing productive sighhh.

most memorable would be my birthday (ah duh) haha. i even had to tackle a quiz on tt day! + a 4hr lab.

long long long overdued pictures!

nachos in tomato!

Birthday girl boy’s girlfriend

me and our frozen magarita!

i liked the card and gift miss ang gave me. but i’ve yet to use the gift!

basically nothin much happen cept rush of work, projects and such..oh in march i passed my ippt too! tts totalyl random. but i passed on my 3rd try. have too pass or it’ll pose a huge problem in going US of A!

i think i need to motivate myself somehow. only 2weeks left! zero confidence in doin well! damn mon got a quiz which i have not study. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

damn facebook im addicted to stupid games like : mafia wars and restaurent city. i need to kick the habit!

25 random notes

as bugggged by Dawn, im oblidged to write this. HAHA

1. Im a teochew, but the only dialect i can speak is cantonese only. coz i used to live with my maternal grandma.

2. I think i have a fierce look, since most bus commuters would choose not to seat on the empty seat beside me on the bus. (experimented).

3. Im a west sider. I grew up frequenting sunset way(pri sch), jurong east(sec sch), bukit timah(majority of my life +jc), bukit batok. damn i miss the old bukit timah market cum foodcentre 😦

4. i cycle almost everyday, cos im lazy to walk to mrt and D’s house. But i dont particularly fancy my bicycle. It attracts unwanted attention. hahahhaha.

5. my CNY holidays are spent peacefully. no hussle and brussle. eversince a few years ago.

6. i choose to run at odd timings. afternoon of CNY (pple were staring at me from their cars) and 11pm around school compounds(gets alil creepy).

7. i hate running; i have flat feet/collapse arch and i damaged my legs while training for ippt- shin/ankle splints.

8. i ran 2.4km in 9min 14.66sec once. i doubt i’ll be able to achieve that timing ever again. rather, i’ll be spending the rest of my life eating glucosamine. Loser!

9. i still remember the dramatic events during my teambuildin week. it freaks me out sometimes. nevertheless it was fun in a sadistic way.

10. i own an advance diving and a class 3 driving license. BUT i have not practised them for years. thats 2x loser.

11. i have a weird desire to be a farmer. i fufilled part of that desire by staying in a farming village during my YEP in vietnam. My homestay house rears monsterous pigs, chickens. other houses have geese and cows.

12. Maybe i would prefer a fruit farm. Living in the cottage when im old. i must be dreaming.

13. i enjoy the times where i sit outside my homestay house staring at the plains and looking at the stars at night. the place is pitch dark and quiet. great place to emo.

14. i like mahjong but i dont get to play often 😦

15. i like sea sports! though i haven tried wakeboarding yet.

16. i don like theme park rides (a better way of phrasing ‘im fearful of roller coasters’). >.<

17. i must read the sunday times / lifestyle. its a habit.

18. i always waste my time checking my email again and again. its worst now that i need to include “nusstu\” before my user name. i hate the guy who implemented this.

19. i like to travel! i hope to travel more during my summer holidays!

20. i have learnt to appreciate what i am studying now. cos if u cant beat them, join them. im forced to appreciate LOL.

21. i used to be afraid of dogs. i love them now!!! chip and belle are soo adorable- they follow me around 🙂

22. i watched the whole of SATC (7seasons) during the last summer holidays with D. But i only watched 1 season of Heroes.

23. im a closet TV junkie. i enjoy hongkong dramas, crappy tawianese variety shows, discovery channel, E hollywood shows, cnn, blahblahblah. i have no idea wads so good abt little n_ _ _ _. that said, i dont watch alot of tv actually! i watch more webcast than the google box.

24. i haven really thought of what i want in life. thats quite bad isnt it?

25. i hate names like WWWR, ID, levenspiel and co. well back to mugging -_-

shall stop here. continue tml!

a small boy in a big big dark world.

i created sadness on myself and inflicted others.

i feel faint..

im not so strong afterall..im not..